juz feel like wanna give up :|

felt like i have a long way to go.
wow, sungguh susah nak turunkan berat....
bila kira bmi td. kena trn sampai 20 kg.
wow, byk 2. x penah target smpi 20 kg nak trnkan.
but, bila da start ni. kena la trskan jg.
but seriusly, it's tiring nak initiate.
mls kdg2 nak g. tpi bila kat track bley plak dia lari.
n da beberapa hari ni. cepat btul haus.
prob yg x taw cemana nak settelkan. huhu.
sdey btul. ingt nak jog lama lagi. huhu.
hanya bley setakat 30 mins jek skrg,
hope so, akan berterusan.
marilah trskan perjuangan, agar tidak sia2.
another 68 days to go!
mari2. jgn tgk slalu days 2.
usaha sampai tarikh yg dah ditetapkan.
=)

this is a lyrics from an ost drama which i like the most for the moment:

(Dream High)
I dream high 난 꿈을 꾸죠 힘들 때면 난 눈을 감고
I Dream High, i dream, when its hard i close my eyes
꿈이 이뤄지는 그 순간을 계속 떠올리며 일어나죠
While i imagine that moment i get up

두려움의 끝에서 난 오늘도 흔들리죠
I shake at the end of fear
떨어질까 봐 날아오르지 못하는 어린 새처럼
Afraid of falling like a baby bird who cant fly up
자꾸 내가 할 수 있나 내 꿈이 이뤄질까
Can I do it, will my dream come true
내딛는 걸음 한 걸음 걸음이 다시 두려워질 때마다
one by one my walking goes when i get afraid
I Dream High 난 꿈을 꾸죠 힘들 때면 난 눈을감고
I Dream High, I dream, when im tired i close my eyes
꿈이 이뤄지는 그 순간을 계속 떠올리먀 일어나죠
I keep imagining that dream while i get up
I can fly high 나는 믿어요 언젠간 난 저 하늘 위로
I can fly high, i belive that i can go up in that sky
날개를 펴고 누구보다도 자유롭개 높이 날아오를 거예요
Open my wings, fly freely up more then anyone

넘어진 날 일으겨 줄 용기가 필요하죠
I need courage that will stand the fallen me
먼지를 털고 다시 일어나 또 한 번 뛰어갈 용기가
I dust the dust, Courage that will stand me and jump once a again
다시 한 번 나를 믿고 나의 운명을 믿고
Belive in myself once more, Belive in my faith
모든 걸 걸고 내 키보다 높은 벽을 뛰어넘을 거예요
Bet everything, and im going to jump a wall taller then me

I dream high 난 꿈을 꾸죠 힘들 때면 난 눈을 감고
I dream high, i dream, when im tired i close my eyes
꿈이 이뤄지는 그 순간을 계속 떠올리며 (다시) 일어나죠
Imagning that my dream will come true while i (again) get up
I can fly high 나는 믿어요 언졘건 넌 저 하늘 위로
I can fly high i belive in that i will go up in that sky
날개를 펴고 누구보다도 자유롭게 높이 (난) 날아오를 거예요
Open my wings and (i'm) going to fly more freely than anyone has

Dream high a chance to fly high
Dream high a chance to fly high
아픔들은 이젠 모두다 bye bye
Bye bye to the hurts
하늘에 있는 저 별들처럼 높이 날아봐
Fly high like the stars in the sky
네 꿈들을 펼쳐 보는 거야 time for you to shine
Open your dreams, time for you to shine
이제부터 시작이야 gotta make em mine
Starting Now, gotta make em mine
네 손으로 이뤄가 미랠 두려워하지 마 인젠 힘껏 자신 있게 걸어가
Dont be afraid of the future in you hands, walk in confidance now
Destiny 숙명이지 멈출 수 없는 운명이 지금
You can't stop destiney now
우리 눈앞에 펼쳐지지 이건 너를 위한 whole new fantasy
Whole new fantasy is open in front of your eyes
그러니 이제부터 여기 내 손을 잡아
So hold my hand now
우리의 목표는 지금부퍼 하나 꿈과 미래 포기하지 않아
Our stop is the same now, dont give up on your dreams
젊음 열정 여기 모두다 Dream High
When your young dream high everyone

I dream high 난 꿈을 꾸죠 힘들 때면 난 눈을 감고
I dream high, I dream, when im tired i close my eyes
꿈이 이뤄지는 그 순갈을 계속 떠올리며 일어나죠
Imagine the dream coming true while getting up
I can fly high 나는 믿어요 언젠간 난 저 하늘 위로
I can fly high, i belive that i can go up that sky
날개를 펴고 누구보다도 자유룹게 높이 날아오를 게예요
Open my wings and fly high freely then anyone else

this time, i have to do it rite.

wow...
mcm x cayew jek...
another 69 days to go,seriusly.
the time passes by without us noticing it,*bukan x sdr, sedar sbb mengira hari.*
tpi mcm x cayew lorh da 12 days jog everyday.
a good thing to do, never miss even once.
hehe.

bila penat 2, rasa mcm x nak lgsg g jog~
but2,bawa jg la badan ni g kat track stadium.
pnt2 pun pergi la. but once da ada atas track,
kaki terus jek jalan warming up..
n tiba2 taw2 da jog....
haish...with the songs accompany me..haha...
n bila mcm da pnt. trskan jg, smpi la dpt mencapai waktu yg mau...
sll bermonolog dalaman dan berkata, i have to do it this time, until i get the best results,
x kisah la org tgr, nas da nmpk turun berat or what so ever,
it is still blm betul2 trn lg.
n at anytime bley naik balik.
dgn berat yg trn mcm sket jek ni kan.* ak pn x taw brape berat aku trn*
macam hampeh jek rasa.

yeah! i have to do it this time.
menunaikan janji yg sudah 5 thn...tetapi x berjaya2 lgsg.huhu.
so, now i have to do it at least, b4 i start work.
nanti da keja, bdn gemok mcm ni. lg cepat penat kerja. huhu
so, i have to do my best..

yeah, i really love it this time.
sbb ramai kawan jg sdg cuba menurunkan berat.
bkn yg bdn2 sket2 gemok. tpi yg mmg obvious gemok.
mereka sama2 memberi kata-kata semangat.
if lah diorg bley buat, xkan la aku x ley wat.
if kak nisa pun da trn berat jadi cun gilew skrg.
kita pun bley!

i hope i can make thru this phase asap.
pls2. i dun wanna suffer a lot.
i juz want to love my body more. n more n more.
it's not all about guys. but they are one of it who triggers me to do it.
si aidi gemok! dia asyik ckp aku gemok.
i'll show it to him. i can be slimmer than b4 n i also can graduate next year together with my whole batch. u juz wait n watch adik busuk! insya-ALLAH. i can do it.

p/s: if u determine, u can do ur best! =) all the best frens. =)

haish.

haish.
mr pharmacy, kenapa la everytime tgk
ur pic. i will like happy~(such a long time x tgk)
haish. it's not dat i love u or what so ever.
wow. ini sgt pelik.
tp everytime i look. wah, mesti ada sket kelainan di situ.
N N N muka kmu sgt bersih~
bersih as bersih. suci murni.
nasib la. i am afraid to talk with u,
due to gap of age. * sbb takut salah ckp, n terasa mcm kurang ajar plak*
owh. ni adalah slh satu reason y i dun want to work in htjs.
sbb2 nanti kena kerja dgn dia jg bila kat medicine ward.
if mr pharmacy x pindah lorh.
pls2...jgn la terkerja 1 tempat. amin.

hari ni hari jumaat ;|

so, today is the 1st weekend after came back schooling here~
haha. mmg dahsyat. x taw nak wat pew. nak rehat for a night.
coz da byk hari study. tpi still x perform.. y?
riak atau yakin sgt kot. haha. padan muka. isk3.
hm, so, td adik call~ auntie mia.
asking about how to do study gp.
so, cakap la blah. blah blah dgn dia.
kononnya cara for study gp. haha. kelakar.
then cerita la dat i seriusly when for a bit exercise n never skip a day yet.
n plan to do it for ++ days.
then, bley plak dgn sarkastiknya dia ckp so, after dat day, nak mkn byk la balik?
nak gemok? sengal punya adik.
nasib la aku ada sorg jek adik. haish, kalow ada byk adik n perangai mcm ni.
bley sakit jiwa. haha.
then, asking when lorh dia balik. n dia ckp balik lwt sket.
konon ada bengkel nak spm thn ni. haha.
she is 17th dis year. mcm x cayew jek bdk kecik 2 da besar. haha.
then, after dat we end our conversation.

hm, n for the first time in my life, i went to dental clinic.
wahaha. gila r. masa skolah dulu nurse yg dtg check gg.
ni aku sendiri pergi jumpa dr mintak treatment.
mula2 ingt nak scaling, tpi then check bg dr tgk dulu la.
haha. so, most gg cantek n elok. cun.
1 jek yg kena tampal. 2 pun gg bongsu.
actually gg bongsu 2 yg mana aku pn x taw.
tpi aku taw yg dlm punya gg la.

haha. then aku mintak r dr tmpalkan gg aku depan yg dulu aku jth main kejar2.
haha. hilang cun aku nanti. * jap, aku ni gemok la, lupa diri plak* =P
so, next appoinment nak mintak tampalkan gg n scaling.
n hopefully la, suma gg masa 2 ok. pls la jgn ada tampal lg.
ngilu gila. huhu.

haaaa. then td ada end of posting assesment.
mmg terbaiklah.
dr ajar benda len, kuar benda len.
mmg skit hati. rasa nak pijak2 jek.
xpew la. weekend ni aku study. tpi mlm sabtuu ni rehat tgk story2 sket.
bdn pnt ni. haha.

doakan la aku berjaya hbskan masa ++days utk trnkan berat.
nak cari suar senang sket.
jgn la aku putus asa. pls2. biar la kali ni berat yg trn 2 permanent,
amin. insya-ALLAH.
when there's a will, there's a way.
haha.

ok... daa~

.....

i miss him.

everytime i read sumthing islamic.

i miss him.

do ignore that feeling~

p/s: 78 days left~

countdown.

wargh~
badan da makin gempal n berisi n bertambah2 gemok.
apsal x benti makan ni? pls la. pls la wahai otak n bdn.
benti la mkn. n trnkan la berat.
mkin susah nak jumpa bju. huhu.
anda xsuka pakai bju ketat kan?
tpi if anda makin gemok, mcm mana suma bju x makin ketat~ hu
seriusly, i have to start sum plan. to reduce my weight~
pls la. pls la. istiqamah buat benda ni kali ni.
82 days jek. pls la pls la.
berthn 4 82 days. n if it works. go on la with it.
besides, bila kurus bley beli bju2 n tutup aurat lg senang.
n n n...
xda la org kata si gemok yg x sdr diri. huhu.
okies. ONLY 82 days.
hope it will succeed. amin.

countdown starting from tom, 82 days left~
jadi kurus mcm kim pil suk~ amin.